It's an endless relief that he doesn't have to explain too much. Even if he was the kind of guy who wanted to talk about feelings (and he's not), even if he wanted to talk about this (and he doesn't), it's all still too raw and close. Aaron's sparing him the ordeal of having to fight it back down, all those interminable, uncountable days rising like bile in the back of his throat any time he lets himself slow down enough to think back on it.

Not everyone understands without words, not enough, and the fact that Aaron does-- it's maybe why he was the first of the Alexandrites who felt like one of their group.

"I got an idea. Just..." He gets uneasy again, not sure he's got a good way to explain what it's like, there. How everything's a game and the games are always rigged. How even the rewards are punishments. Maybe it was someone breaking through, defying the whole goddamn business; maybe she was meant to do it. Maybe they're all being tested. There's no way of telling. There's no certainty, because if anything could ever be certain there, then people wouldn't stand for Negan's bullshit.

"Hard to be sure."